Welcome, Class of 2013! College Orientation Rites

Most freshmen will experience an avalanche of initiatory rites in the next few weeks. Some  already had their orientation back in June. But for many, this is the first time they will set foot on campus since their first tour over a year ago.

The edge of a great beginning. Here’s what to expect!

Many colleges offer optional outdoor pre-orientation programs to help small groups of freshmen bond through recreation, fitness or adventure trips before the official orientation week begins. College students often say that they find some of their best, long-lasting friendships that first week on an outdoor pre-orientation trip. Who knows?

Activities can include camping, hiking, mountain biking, rafting, kayaking, water skiing, sailing, challenge courses, the list goes on. Don’t worry, no skydiving. They’ll do that on their own, just to torture you!

Schools such as Duke, Muhlenberg, Bucknell, Lafayette, Kenyon, Tufts, Loyola, Hamilton and Bowdoin offer optional community service pre-orientation programs. These programs are great for freshmen who may not be “into” the outdoors, who would rather serve their college’s surrounding community, while also getting acquainted with each other.

Typically, dorm move-in immediately follows pre-orientation (some schools allow freshmen to move in prior to pre-orientation trips). Formal programs for students and parents begin shortly thereafter, with social activities to help freshmen get acquainted during the evenings. Having met my husband of 29 years at a dorm party the first week of school, I am a big believer that even the shyest student should make an effort to reach out at these events.

You can expect formal orientation schedules to include receptions, discussion panels, campus tours, president’s welcome events, academic department fairs, activity fairs, and religious services. Parents are then politely asked to “depart” (ah, such an understatement). After the “‘rents” are gone, orientation becomes more focused, with academic advising, placement exams, and class enrollment.

Make good use of time when your teen is away on a pre-orientation trip or social activity during orientation. Hopefully, you have assembled a college transition “bible” over the summer and now have it at your fingertips as a guide! Print out my college dorm checklist too. Get the lay of the land, so you can suggest close-by grocery stores, pharmacies, hair salons, office supply stores, UPS stores and eateries. Check out where shuttles and buses stop; locate nearby subway or light rail stations.

If you haven’t bought all the dorm room items yet, find a Staples, Bed Bath and Beyond, Target, Walmart, JCPenney, or Container Store in the area. If it’s too stressful to schlep multiple loads, you can rent a cargo van for under $20 a day (U-Haul, Budget). Don’t forget the Advil…your muscles will ache at the end of the day! You will sleep well!

If this is your first child going to college, keeping busy will have another benefit, too…and you know what it is.

The moment is coming. It will be different for everyone. Hopefully, you have talked about the separation now and again over the summer, so there has been some natural preparation. My advice is, be genuine, but don’t overdo it. Your goal is to help your child process this transition and feel good about the new world he or she is entering, not let it all hang out.

What to do after you leave is probably a whole post in and of itself, so let’s save that topic! Meanwhile, I welcome sharing of experiences from parents who have gone through orientation, move-in, and campus “departure”.